by Jennifer Wolkin | Mar 9, 2015 | Wellness
I am every woman
who serves our country on the front lines
of trauma
who goes through puberty
awkward ashamed and framed
by mother nature
who feels stigmatized or satirized
as latter-day hysterics
made to think it is all in our heads
and
you are every woman
who gives birth to a hungry child
in war-torn Africa
who loses an ovary
or a breast or a uterus
to cancer or just to life
who cycles as each mood
is manifested by screaming hormones
and
she is every woman
who drinks to numb the pain
of post-partum lows
who feels betrayed by the body
as she ages physically but not in spirit
who binges and starves
behind society’s billboard of expectations
but
we are every woman
who dreams outside
of the box
who prays
eyes closed lips moving
who cries viscerally
laying in a fetal position
from a broken heart
or mind or body or soul
but
we are every woman who rises up-
every time. everywhere.
***
Who is a woman you are grateful for? Look up to? Respect? Tell us about the special woman in your lives and why they are EVERY Woman…
Let’s Thrive,
Dr. Jen
by Jennifer Wolkin | Sep 18, 2014 | Wellness
Hillel says, “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I?” Pirkei Avot 1:14
This adage has always resonated with me. What I appreciate most about it is the suggestion that our healthy existence on this earth is about BALANCE. As both a human being and as a psychologist, I know just how much our mental milieu is impacted upon by our ability to find balance in our lives. Many of us know this, especially in this age when terms like mind-body and work-life balance are thrown around. But…do we really KNOW this? I’m not so sure…
Two words, which I use at least five times a week during sessions with individual clients, are Self-Care. I can’t begin to tell you how confusing these two words are to my clients when they are first heard. Some of the confusion elicits these kinds of questions:
You can actually care for your Self?
Isn’t it selfish to engage in Self-Care?
How can I care for my SELF when I need to take care of others?
So begins the journey of identifying and exploring what self-care means, and why it is not only important, but crucial!
Imagine this: The Boston Pops or the NY Philharmonic gets on stage and the “first string” violinist forgot to tune his fiddle. Um…cacophony! Not only is that fiddle out of tune now, but so is the entire ensemble.
Humans need tuning too. We need to be care for ourselves so that we can step up and take a stand for ourselves, to be present to manifest our desires to live a full, BIG, and meaningful life…one which we deserve! Yes, deserve! It is our birthright to have the life we want, and we are the only ones who can make that actually happen.
Here’s the neat thing though. When we tune ourselves, when we set boundaries, or do yoga 2x week, or take a bubble bath, or write in our journals, or just plop on the couch after a stressful day, we are not only helping ourselves…we help the whole ensemble. Yes, when you are your best you for yourself, you are also the best wife, husband, daughter, lover, friend, therapist, fiddle player, etc ;).
So, remember this: when we show up for ourselves, balance is almost inevitable. Vice versa needs to be true too…when we show up for others, we also make a point of showing up for ourselves.
The ultimate bottom line though about balance and everything else is that it is a journey…keep at it just one step at a time.
Would love to hear your thoughts: Do you engage in healthy self-care? If so, how? If not, in what ways can you step up for yourself today?
Let’s Thrive,
Dr. Jen @BrainCurves
